So I have heard. At one time the Buddha was wandering in the land of the Kosalans together with a large Saṅgha of mendicants. Now at that time a brahmin lady named Dhanañjānī was residing at Caṇḍalakappa. She was devoted to the Buddha, the teaching, and the Saṅgha. Once, she tripped and expressed this heartfelt sentiment three times:
PL
Evaṁ me sutaṁ— ekaṁ samayaṁ bhagavā kosalesu cārikaṁ carati mahatā bhikkhusaṅghena saddhiṁ. Tena kho pana samayena dhanañjānī nāma brāhmaṇī cañcalikappe paṭivasati abhippasannā buddhe ca dhamme ca saṅghe ca. Atha kho dhanañjānī brāhmaṇī upakkhalitvā tikkhattuṁ udānaṁ udānesi:
EN
“Homage to him, the blessed one, the perfected one, the fully awakened Buddha! Homage to him, the blessed one, the perfected one, the fully awakened Buddha! Homage to him, the blessed one, the perfected one, the fully awakened Buddha!” Now at that time the student Saṅgārava was residing in Caṇḍalakappa. He was young, newly tonsured; he was sixteen years old. He had mastered the three Vedas, together with their vocabularies and ritual performance, their phonology and word classification, and the testaments as fifth. He knew them word-by-word, and their grammar. He was well versed in cosmology and the marks of a great man.
Hearing Dhanañjānī’s exclamation, he said to her, “The brahmin lady Dhanañjānī is a disgrace! Though brahmins proficient in the three Vedas are found, she will praise that shaveling, that fake ascetic.”
“But dearest boy, you don’t understand the Buddha’s ethics and wisdom. If you did, you’d never think of abusing or insulting him.” “Well then, ma’am, let me know when the Buddha arrives in Caṇḍalakappa.”
“I will, dearest,” she replied. And then the Buddha, traveling stage by stage in the Kosalan lands, arrived at Caṇḍalakappa, where he stayed in the mango grove of the Todeyya brahmins. Dhanañjānī heard that he had arrived.
So she went to Saṅgārava and told him, adding, “Please, dearest boy, go at your convenience.” “Yes, ma’am,” replied Saṅgārava. He went to the Buddha and exchanged greetings with him.
When the greetings and polite conversation were over, he sat down to one side and said to the Buddha: “Worthy Gotama, there are some ascetics and brahmins who claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life having attained perfection and consummation of insight in this life. Where do you stand regarding these?”
“I say there is a disparity among those who claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life having attained perfection and consummation of insight in this life. There are some ascetics and brahmins who are oral transmitters. Through oral transmission they claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life. For example, the brahmins who are proficient in the three Vedas.
There are some ascetics and brahmins who solely by mere faith claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life. For example, those who rely on logic and inquiry. There are some ascetics and brahmins who, having directly known for themselves the principle regarding teachings not learned before from another, claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life.
I am one of those. And here’s a way to understand that I am one of them.
PL
Tatra, bhāradvāja, ye te samaṇabrāhmaṇā pubbe ananussutesu dhammesu sāmaṁyeva dhammaṁ abhiññāya diṭṭhadhammābhiññāvosānapāramippattā, ādibrahmacariyaṁ paṭijānanti, tesāhamasmi. Tadamināpetaṁ, bhāradvāja, pariyāyena veditabbaṁ, yathā ye te samaṇabrāhmaṇā pubbe ananussutesu dhammesu sāmaṁyeva dhammaṁ abhiññāya diṭṭhadhammābhiññāvosānapāramippattā, ādibrahmacariyaṁ paṭijānanti, tesāhamasmi.
EN
Before my awakening—when I was still unawakened but intent on awakening—I thought: ‘Life at home is cramped and dirty, life gone forth is wide open. It’s not easy for someone living at home to lead the spiritual life utterly full and pure, like a polished shell. Why don’t I shave off my hair and beard, dress in ocher robes, and go forth from the lay life to homelessness?’
Some time later, while still with pristine black hair, blessed with youth, in the prime of life—though my mother and father wished otherwise, weeping with tearful faces—I shaved off my hair and beard, dressed in ocher robes, and went forth from the lay life to homelessness. Once I had gone forth I set out to discover what is skillful, seeking the supreme state of sublime peace. I approached Āḷāra Kālāma and said to him,
‘Reverend Kālāma, I wish to lead the spiritual life in this teaching and training.’ Āḷāra Kālāma replied, ‘Stay, venerable. This teaching is such that a sensible person can soon realize their own denomination with their own insight and live having achieved it.’
I quickly memorized that teaching. As far as lip-recital and verbal repetition went, I spoke the doctrine of knowledge, the elder doctrine. I claimed to know and see, and so did others. Then it occurred to me, ‘It is not solely by mere faith that Āḷāra Kālāma declares: “I realize this teaching with my own insight, and live having achieved it.”
Surely he meditates knowing and seeing this teaching.’ So I approached Āḷāra Kālāma and said to him: ‘Reverend Kālāma, to what extent do you say you’ve realized this teaching with your own insight?’ When I said this, he declared the dimension of nothingness.
immersion, and wisdom; I too have these things. Why don’t I make an effort to realize the same teaching that Āḷāra Kālāma says he has realized with his own insight?’ I quickly realized that teaching with my own insight, and lived having achieved it.
So I approached Āḷāra Kālāma and said to him, ‘Reverend Kālāma, is it up to this point that you realized this teaching with your own insight, and declare having achieved it?’ ‘I have, reverend.’
‘I too have realized this teaching with my own insight up to this point, and live having achieved it.’ ‘We are fortunate, reverend, so very fortunate to see a venerable such as yourself as one of our spiritual companions! So the teaching that I’ve realized with my own insight, and declare having achieved it, you’ve realized with your own insight, and dwell having achieved it.
The teaching that you’ve realized with your own insight, and dwell having achieved it, I’ve realized with my own insight, and declare having achieved it. So the teaching that I know, you know, and the teaching you know, I know. I am like you and you are like me.
Come now, reverend! We should both lead this community together.’ And that is how my tutor Āḷāra Kālāma placed me, his pupil, on the same position as him, and honored me with high praise. Then it occurred to me, ‘This teaching doesn’t lead to disillusionment, dispassion, cessation, peace, insight, awakening, and extinguishment. It only leads as far as rebirth in the dimension of nothingness.’
PL
Ehi dāni, āvuso, ubhova santā imaṁ gaṇaṁ pariharāmā’ti. Iti kho, bhāradvāja, āḷāro kālāmo ācariyo me samāno attano antevāsiṁ maṁ samānaṁ attanā samasamaṁ ṭhapesi, uḷārāya ca maṁ pūjāya pūjesi. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘nāyaṁ dhammo nibbidāya na virāgāya na nirodhāya na upasamāya na abhiññāya na sambodhāya na nibbānāya saṁvattati, yāvadeva ākiñcaññāyatanūpapattiyā’ti.
EN
Realizing that this teaching was inadequate, I left disappointed. I set out to discover what is skillful, seeking the supreme state of sublime peace. I approached Uddaka son of Rāma and said to him, ‘Reverend, I wish to lead the spiritual life in this teaching and training.’
Uddaka replied, ‘Stay, venerable. This teaching is such that a sensible person can soon realize their own denomination with their own insight and live having achieved it.’ I quickly memorized that teaching.
As far as lip-recital and verbal repetition went, I spoke the doctrine of knowledge, the elder doctrine. I claimed to know and see, and so did others. Then it occurred to me, ‘It is not solely by mere faith that Rāma declared: “I realize this teaching with my own insight, and live having achieved it.”
Surely he meditated knowing and seeing this teaching.’ So I approached Uddaka son of Rāma and said to him, ‘Reverend, to what extent did Rāma say he’d realized this teaching with his own insight?’ When I said this, Uddaka son of Rāma declared the dimension of neither perception nor non-perception.
Then it occurred to me, ‘It’s not just Rāma who had faith, energy, mindfulness,
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘na kho rāmasseva ahosi saddhā, mayhampatthi saddhā; na kho rāmasseva ahosi vīriyaṁ …pe… sati …
EN
immersion, and wisdom; I too have these things. Why don’t I make an effort to realize the same teaching that Rāma said he had realized with his own insight?’ I quickly realized that teaching with my own insight, and lived having achieved it.
So I approached Uddaka son of Rāma and said to him, ‘Reverend, had Rāma realized this teaching with his own insight up to this point, and declared having achieved it?’ ‘He had, reverend.’
‘I too have realized this teaching with my own insight up to this point, and live having achieved it.’ ‘We are fortunate, reverend, so very fortunate to see a venerable such as yourself as one of our spiritual companions! So the teaching that Rāma had realized with his own insight, and declared having achieved it, you’ve realized with your own insight, and dwell having achieved it.
The teaching that you’ve realized with your own insight, and dwell having achieved it, Rāma had realized with his own insight, and declared having achieved it. So the teaching that Rāma directly knew, you know, and the teaching you know, Rāma directly knew. Rāma was like you and you are like Rāma.
Come now, reverend! You should lead this community.’ And that is how my spiritual companion Uddaka son of Rāma placed me in the position of a tutor and honored me with high praise. Then it occurred to me, ‘This teaching doesn’t lead to disillusionment, dispassion, cessation, peace, insight, awakening, and extinguishment. It only leads as far as rebirth in the dimension of neither perception nor non-perception.’
PL
Ehi dāni, āvuso, tuvaṁ imaṁ gaṇaṁ pariharā’ti. Iti kho, bhāradvāja, udako rāmaputto sabrahmacārī me samāno ācariyaṭṭhāne maṁ ṭhapesi, uḷārāya ca maṁ pūjāya pūjesi. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘nāyaṁ dhammo nibbidāya na virāgāya na nirodhāya na upasamāya na abhiññāya na sambodhāya na nibbānāya saṁvattati, yāvadeva nevasaññānāsaññāyatanūpapattiyā’ti.
EN
Realizing that this teaching was inadequate, I left disappointed. I set out to discover what is skillful, seeking the supreme state of sublime peace. Traveling stage by stage in the Magadhan lands, I arrived at the town of Senā in Uruvelā. There I saw a delightful park, a lovely grove with a flowing river that was clean and charming, with smooth banks. And nearby was a village to resort to for alms.
Then it occurred to me, ‘This park is truly delightful, a lovely grove with a flowing river that’s clean and charming, with smooth banks. And nearby there’s a village to resort to for alms. This is good enough for striving for a gentleman wanting to strive.’ So I sat down right there, thinking:
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘ramaṇīyo vata bho bhūmibhāgo, pāsādiko ca vanasaṇḍo, nadī ca sandati setakā supatitthā ramaṇīyā, samantā ca gocaragāmo. Alaṁ vatidaṁ kulaputtassa padhānatthikassa padhānāyā’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, tattheva nisīdiṁ:
EN
‘This is good enough for striving.’ And then these three similes, which were neither supernaturally inspired, nor learned before in the past, occurred to me. Suppose there was a green, sappy log, and it was lying in water. Then a person comes along with a drill-stick, thinking
to light a fire and produce heat. What do you think, Bhāradvāja? By drilling the stick against that green, sappy log lying in water, could they light a fire and produce heat?” “No, worthy Gotama.
PL
‘aggiṁ abhinibbattessāmi, tejo pātukarissāmī’ti. Taṁ kiṁ maññasi, bhāradvāja, api nu so puriso amuṁ allaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ sasnehaṁ udake nikkhittaṁ uttarāraṇiṁ ādāya abhimanthento aggiṁ abhinibbatteyya, tejo pātukareyyā”ti? “No hidaṁ, bho gotama.
EN
Why is that? Because it’s a green, sappy log, and it’s lying in the water. That person will eventually get weary and frustrated.” “In the same way, there are ascetics and brahmins who don’t live withdrawn in body and mind from sensual pleasures. They haven’t internally given up or stilled desire, affection, infatuation, thirst, and passion for sensual pleasures. Regardless of whether or not they suffer painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion, they are incapable of knowledge and vision, of supreme awakening.
PL
Taṁ kissa hetu? Aduñhi, bho gotama, allaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ sasnehaṁ, tañca pana udake nikkhittaṁ; yāvadeva ca pana so puriso kilamathassa vighātassa bhāgī assā”ti. “Evameva kho, bhāradvāja, ye hi keci samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā kāyena ceva cittena ca kāmehi avūpakaṭṭhā viharanti, yo ca nesaṁ kāmesu kāmacchando kāmasneho kāmamucchā kāmapipāsā kāmapariḷāho so ca ajjhattaṁ na suppahīno hoti na suppaṭippassaddho, opakkamikā cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, abhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya. No cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti abhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya.
EN
This was the first example that occurred to me. Then a second example occurred to me. Suppose there was a green, sappy log, and it was lying on dry land far from the water. Then a person comes along with a drill-stick, thinking
to light a fire and produce heat. What do you think, Bhāradvāja? By drilling the stick against that green, sappy log on dry land far from water, could they light a fire and produce heat?” “No, worthy Gotama.
Why is that? Because it’s still a green, sappy log, despite the fact that it’s lying on dry land far from water. That person will eventually get weary and frustrated.” “In the same way, there are ascetics and brahmins who live withdrawn in body and mind from sensual pleasures. But they haven’t internally given up or stilled desire, affection, infatuation, thirst, and passion for sensual pleasures. Regardless of whether or not they suffer painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion, they are incapable of knowledge and vision, of supreme awakening.
PL
Taṁ kissa hetu? Aduñhi, bho gotama, allaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ sasnehaṁ, kiñcāpi ārakā udakā thale nikkhittaṁ; yāvadeva ca pana so puriso kilamathassa vighātassa bhāgī assā”ti. “Evameva kho, bhāradvāja, ye hi keci samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā kāyena ceva cittena ca kāmehi vūpakaṭṭhā viharanti, yo ca nesaṁ kāmesu kāmacchando kāmasneho kāmamucchā kāmapipāsā kāmapariḷāho so ca ajjhattaṁ na suppahīno hoti na suppaṭippassaddho, opakkamikā cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, abhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya. No cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, abhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya.
EN
This was the second example that occurred to me. Then a third example occurred to me. Suppose there was a dried up, withered log, and it was lying on dry land far from the water. Then a person comes along with a drill-stick, thinking
to light a fire and produce heat. What do you think, Bhāradvāja? By drilling the stick against that dried up, withered log on dry land far from water, could they light a fire and produce heat?” “Yes, worthy Gotama.
PL
‘aggiṁ abhinibbattessāmi, tejo pātukarissāmī’ti. Taṁ kiṁ maññasi, bhāradvāja, api nu so puriso amuṁ sukkhaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ koḷāpaṁ ārakā udakā thale nikkhittaṁ uttarāraṇiṁ ādāya abhimanthento aggiṁ abhinibbatteyya, tejo pātukareyyā”ti? “Evaṁ, bho gotama.
EN
Why is that? Because it’s a dried up, withered log, and it’s lying on dry land far from water.” “In the same way, there are ascetics and brahmins who live withdrawn in body and mind from sensual pleasures. And they have internally given up and stilled desire, affection, infatuation, thirst, and passion for sensual pleasures. Regardless of whether or not they suffer painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion, they are capable of knowledge and vision, of supreme awakening.
PL
Taṁ kissa hetu? Aduñhi, bho gotama, sukkhaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ koḷāpaṁ, tañca pana ārakā udakā thale nikkhittan”ti. “Evameva kho, bhāradvāja, ye hi keci samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā kāyena ceva cittena ca kāmehi vūpakaṭṭhā viharanti, yo ca nesaṁ kāmesu kāmacchando kāmasneho kāmamucchā kāmapipāsā kāmapariḷāho so ca ajjhattaṁ suppahīno hoti suppaṭippassaddho, opakkamikā cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, bhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya. No cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, bhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya.
EN
This was the third example that occurred to me. These are the three similes, which were neither supernaturally inspired, nor learned before in the past, that occurred to me. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I, with teeth clenched and tongue pressed against the roof of my mouth, squeeze, squash, and scorch mind with mind?’
It was like when a strong man grabs a weaker man by the head or throat or shoulder and squeezes, squashes, and crushes them. In the same way, with teeth clenched and tongue pressed against the roof of my mouth, I squeezed, squashed, and crushed mind with mind until sweat ran from my armpits.
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I practice the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then winds came out my ears making a severe noise, like the puffing of a blacksmith’s bellows.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu kaṇṇasotehi vātānaṁ nikkhamantānaṁ adhimatto saddo hoti. Seyyathāpi nāma kammāragaggariyā dhamamānāya adhimatto saddo hoti; evameva kho me, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu kaṇṇasotehi vātānaṁ nikkhamantānaṁ adhimatto saddo hoti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then severe winds ground my head, like a strong man was drilling into my head with a sharp point.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā muddhani ūhananti. Seyyathāpi, bhāradvāja, balavā puriso, tiṇhena sikharena muddhani abhimattheyya; evameva kho me, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā muddhani ūhananti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then I got a severe headache, like a strong man was tightening a strong leather strap around my head.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā sīse sīsavedanā honti. Seyyathāpi, bhāradvāja, balavā puriso daḷhena varattakkhaṇḍena sīse sīsaveṭhaṁ dadeyya; evameva kho, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā sīse sīsavedanā honti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then severe winds carved up my belly, like a deft butcher or their apprentice was slicing my belly open with a sharp meat cleaver.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā kucchiṁ parikantanti. Seyyathāpi, bhāradvāja, dakkho goghātako vā goghātakantevāsī vā tiṇhena govikantanena kucchiṁ parikanteyya; evameva kho me, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā kucchiṁ parikantanti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then there was a severe burning in my body, like two strong men grabbing a weaker man by the arms to burn and scorch him on a pit of glowing coals.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimatto kāyasmiṁ ḍāho hoti. Seyyathāpi, bhāradvāja, dve balavanto purisā dubbalataraṁ purisaṁ nānābāhāsu gahetvā aṅgārakāsuyā santāpeyyuṁ samparitāpeyyuṁ; evameva kho me, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimatto kāyasmiṁ ḍāho hoti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then some deities saw me and said, ‘The ascetic Gotama is dead.’ Others said,
‘He’s not dead, but he’s dying.’ Others said, ‘He’s not dead or dying. The ascetic Gotama is a perfected one, for that is how the perfected ones live.’
PL
‘na kālaṅkato samaṇo gotamo, api ca kālaṁ karotī’ti. Ekaccā devatā evamāhaṁsu: ‘na kālaṅkato samaṇo gotamo, nāpi kālaṁ karoti; arahaṁ samaṇo gotamo, vihāro tveva so arahato evarūpo hotī’ti.
EN
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I practice completely cutting off food?’ But deities came to me and said, ‘Good fellow, don’t practice totally cutting off food.
If you do, we’ll infuse heavenly nectar into your pores and you will live on that.’ Then it occurred to me, ‘If I claim to be completely fasting while these deities are infusing heavenly nectar in my pores, that would be a lie on my part.’
So I refused those deities, saying, ‘There’s no need.’ Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I just take a little bit of food each time, a handful of broth made from mung beans, horse gram, chickpeas, or green gram?’
Due to eating so little, my major and minor limbs became like the joints of an eighty-year-old or a dying man, my bottom became like a camel’s hoof, my vertebrae stuck out like beads on a string, and my ribs were as gaunt as the broken-down rafters on an old barn.
PL
Seyyathāpi nāma āsītikapabbāni vā kāḷapabbāni vā; evamevassu me aṅgapaccaṅgāni bhavanti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma oṭṭhapadaṁ; evamevassu me ānisadaṁ hoti tāyevappāhāratāya; seyyathāpi nāma vaṭṭanāvaḷī; evamevassu me piṭṭhikaṇṭako uṇṇatāvanato hoti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma jarasālāya gopānasiyo oluggaviluggā bhavanti; evamevassu me phāsuḷiyo oluggaviluggā bhavanti tāyevappāhāratāya.
EN
Due to eating so little, the gleam of my eyes sank deep in their sockets, like the gleam of water sunk deep down a well. Due to eating so little, my scalp shriveled and withered like a green bitter-gourd in the wind and sun.
Due to eating so little, the skin of my belly stuck to my backbone, so that when I tried to rub the skin of my belly I grabbed my backbone, and when I tried to rub my backbone I rubbed the skin of my belly. Due to eating so little, when I tried to urinate or defecate I fell face down right there.
Due to eating so little, when I tried to relieve my body by rubbing my limbs with my hands, the hair, rotted at its roots, fell out. Then some people saw me and said: ‘The ascetic Gotama is black.’ Some said: ‘He’s not black, he’s brown.’
Some said: ‘He’s neither black nor brown. The ascetic Gotama has dingy skin.’ That’s how far the pure, bright complexion of my skin had been ruined by taking so little food. Then it occurred to me, ‘Whatever ascetics and brahmins have experienced painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion—whether in the past, future, or present—this is as far as it goes, no-one has done more than this.
Could there be another path to awakening?’ Then it occurred to me, ‘I recall sitting in the cool shade of a black plum tree while my father the Sakyan was off working. Quite secluded from sensual pleasures, secluded from unskillful qualities, I entered and remained in the first absorption, which has the rapture and bliss born of seclusion, while placing the mind and keeping it connected. Could that be the path to awakening?’
Stemming from that memory came the understanding: ‘That is the path to awakening!’ Then it occurred to me, ‘Why am I afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities?’
Then it occurred to me, ‘I’m not afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities.’ Then it occurred to me, ‘I can’t achieve that pleasure with a body so severely emaciated. Why don’t I eat some solid food, some rice and porridge?’
So I ate some solid food. Now at that time the group of five mendicants were attending on me, thinking, ‘The ascetic Gotama will tell us of any truth that he realizes.’
But when I ate some solid food, they left disappointed in me, saying, ‘The ascetic Gotama has become indulgent; he has strayed from the struggle and returned to indulgence.’ After eating solid food and gathering my strength, quite secluded from sensual pleasures, secluded from unskillful qualities, I entered and remained in the first absorption …
As the placing of the mind and keeping it connected were stilled, I entered and remained in the second absorption … third absorption … fourth absorption. When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward recollection of past lives.
I recollected many past lives. That is: one, two, three, four, five, ten, twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, a hundred, a thousand, a hundred thousand rebirths; many eons of the world contracting, many eons of the world expanding, many eons of the world contracting and expanding. And so I recollected my many kinds of past lives, with features and details. This was the first knowledge, which I achieved in the first watch of the night. Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute.
When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward knowledge of the death and rebirth of sentient beings. With clairvoyance that is purified and superhuman, I saw sentient beings passing away and being reborn—inferior and superior, beautiful and ugly, in a good place or a bad place. I understood how sentient beings pass on according to their deeds.
This was the second knowledge, which I achieved in the middle watch of the night. Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute. When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward knowledge of the ending of defilements.
I truly understood: ‘This is suffering’ … ‘This is the origin of suffering’ … ‘This is the cessation of suffering’ … ‘This is the practice that leads to the cessation of suffering.’ I truly understood: ‘These are defilements’ … ‘This is the origin of defilements’ … ‘This is the cessation of defilements’ … ‘This is the practice that leads to the cessation of defilements.’
Knowing and seeing like this, my mind was freed from the defilements of sensuality, desire to be reborn, and ignorance. When it was freed, I knew it was freed. I understood: ‘Rebirth is ended; the spiritual journey has been completed; what had to be done has been done; there is nothing further for this place.’ This was the third knowledge, which I achieved in the last watch of the night.
Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute.” When he had spoken, Saṅgārava said to the Buddha, “The striving of the worthy Gotama was indeed assiduous and that of a true person, since he is a perfected one, a fully awakened Buddha.
But worthy Gotama, do gods survive?” “I’ve understood about gods in terms of causes.” “But worthy Gotama, when asked ‘Do gods survive?’ why did you say that you have understood about gods in terms of causes?
That being so, is it not hollow and false?” “When asked ‘Do gods survive’, whether you reply ‘Gods survive’ or ‘I’ve understood in terms of causes’ a sensible person would come to the categorical conclusion in this matter that gods survive.”
“But why didn’t you say that in the first place?” “It is agreed by the eminent in the world that gods survive.” When he had spoken, Saṅgārava said to the Buddha,
“Excellent, worthy Gotama! Excellent! As if he were righting the overturned, or revealing the hidden, or pointing out the path to the lost, or lighting a lamp in the dark so people with clear eyes can see what’s there, worthy Gotama has made the Teaching clear in many ways.
I go for refuge to the worthy Gotama, to the teaching, and to the mendicant Saṅgha. From this day forth, may the worthy Gotama remember me as a lay follower who has gone for refuge for life.”
So I have heard. At one time the Buddha was wandering in the land of the Kosalans together with a large Saṅgha of mendicants. Now at that time a brahmin lady named Dhanañjānī was residing at Caṇḍalakappa. She was devoted to the Buddha, the teaching, and the Saṅgha. Once, she tripped and expressed this heartfelt sentiment three times:
PL
Evaṁ me sutaṁ— ekaṁ samayaṁ bhagavā kosalesu cārikaṁ carati mahatā bhikkhusaṅghena saddhiṁ. Tena kho pana samayena dhanañjānī nāma brāhmaṇī cañcalikappe paṭivasati abhippasannā buddhe ca dhamme ca saṅghe ca. Atha kho dhanañjānī brāhmaṇī upakkhalitvā tikkhattuṁ udānaṁ udānesi:
EN
“Homage to him, the blessed one, the perfected one, the fully awakened Buddha! Homage to him, the blessed one, the perfected one, the fully awakened Buddha! Homage to him, the blessed one, the perfected one, the fully awakened Buddha!” Now at that time the student Saṅgārava was residing in Caṇḍalakappa. He was young, newly tonsured; he was sixteen years old. He had mastered the three Vedas, together with their vocabularies and ritual performance, their phonology and word classification, and the testaments as fifth. He knew them word-by-word, and their grammar. He was well versed in cosmology and the marks of a great man.
Hearing Dhanañjānī’s exclamation, he said to her, “The brahmin lady Dhanañjānī is a disgrace! Though brahmins proficient in the three Vedas are found, she will praise that shaveling, that fake ascetic.”
“But dearest boy, you don’t understand the Buddha’s ethics and wisdom. If you did, you’d never think of abusing or insulting him.” “Well then, ma’am, let me know when the Buddha arrives in Caṇḍalakappa.”
“I will, dearest,” she replied. And then the Buddha, traveling stage by stage in the Kosalan lands, arrived at Caṇḍalakappa, where he stayed in the mango grove of the Todeyya brahmins. Dhanañjānī heard that he had arrived.
So she went to Saṅgārava and told him, adding, “Please, dearest boy, go at your convenience.” “Yes, ma’am,” replied Saṅgārava. He went to the Buddha and exchanged greetings with him.
When the greetings and polite conversation were over, he sat down to one side and said to the Buddha: “Worthy Gotama, there are some ascetics and brahmins who claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life having attained perfection and consummation of insight in this life. Where do you stand regarding these?”
“I say there is a disparity among those who claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life having attained perfection and consummation of insight in this life. There are some ascetics and brahmins who are oral transmitters. Through oral transmission they claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life. For example, the brahmins who are proficient in the three Vedas.
There are some ascetics and brahmins who solely by mere faith claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life. For example, those who rely on logic and inquiry. There are some ascetics and brahmins who, having directly known for themselves the principle regarding teachings not learned before from another, claim to have mastered the fundamentals of the spiritual life.
I am one of those. And here’s a way to understand that I am one of them.
PL
Tatra, bhāradvāja, ye te samaṇabrāhmaṇā pubbe ananussutesu dhammesu sāmaṁyeva dhammaṁ abhiññāya diṭṭhadhammābhiññāvosānapāramippattā, ādibrahmacariyaṁ paṭijānanti, tesāhamasmi. Tadamināpetaṁ, bhāradvāja, pariyāyena veditabbaṁ, yathā ye te samaṇabrāhmaṇā pubbe ananussutesu dhammesu sāmaṁyeva dhammaṁ abhiññāya diṭṭhadhammābhiññāvosānapāramippattā, ādibrahmacariyaṁ paṭijānanti, tesāhamasmi.
EN
Before my awakening—when I was still unawakened but intent on awakening—I thought: ‘Life at home is cramped and dirty, life gone forth is wide open. It’s not easy for someone living at home to lead the spiritual life utterly full and pure, like a polished shell. Why don’t I shave off my hair and beard, dress in ocher robes, and go forth from the lay life to homelessness?’
Some time later, while still with pristine black hair, blessed with youth, in the prime of life—though my mother and father wished otherwise, weeping with tearful faces—I shaved off my hair and beard, dressed in ocher robes, and went forth from the lay life to homelessness. Once I had gone forth I set out to discover what is skillful, seeking the supreme state of sublime peace. I approached Āḷāra Kālāma and said to him,
‘Reverend Kālāma, I wish to lead the spiritual life in this teaching and training.’ Āḷāra Kālāma replied, ‘Stay, venerable. This teaching is such that a sensible person can soon realize their own denomination with their own insight and live having achieved it.’
I quickly memorized that teaching. As far as lip-recital and verbal repetition went, I spoke the doctrine of knowledge, the elder doctrine. I claimed to know and see, and so did others. Then it occurred to me, ‘It is not solely by mere faith that Āḷāra Kālāma declares: “I realize this teaching with my own insight, and live having achieved it.”
Surely he meditates knowing and seeing this teaching.’ So I approached Āḷāra Kālāma and said to him: ‘Reverend Kālāma, to what extent do you say you’ve realized this teaching with your own insight?’ When I said this, he declared the dimension of nothingness.
immersion, and wisdom; I too have these things. Why don’t I make an effort to realize the same teaching that Āḷāra Kālāma says he has realized with his own insight?’ I quickly realized that teaching with my own insight, and lived having achieved it.
So I approached Āḷāra Kālāma and said to him, ‘Reverend Kālāma, is it up to this point that you realized this teaching with your own insight, and declare having achieved it?’ ‘I have, reverend.’
‘I too have realized this teaching with my own insight up to this point, and live having achieved it.’ ‘We are fortunate, reverend, so very fortunate to see a venerable such as yourself as one of our spiritual companions! So the teaching that I’ve realized with my own insight, and declare having achieved it, you’ve realized with your own insight, and dwell having achieved it.
The teaching that you’ve realized with your own insight, and dwell having achieved it, I’ve realized with my own insight, and declare having achieved it. So the teaching that I know, you know, and the teaching you know, I know. I am like you and you are like me.
Come now, reverend! We should both lead this community together.’ And that is how my tutor Āḷāra Kālāma placed me, his pupil, on the same position as him, and honored me with high praise. Then it occurred to me, ‘This teaching doesn’t lead to disillusionment, dispassion, cessation, peace, insight, awakening, and extinguishment. It only leads as far as rebirth in the dimension of nothingness.’
PL
Ehi dāni, āvuso, ubhova santā imaṁ gaṇaṁ pariharāmā’ti. Iti kho, bhāradvāja, āḷāro kālāmo ācariyo me samāno attano antevāsiṁ maṁ samānaṁ attanā samasamaṁ ṭhapesi, uḷārāya ca maṁ pūjāya pūjesi. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘nāyaṁ dhammo nibbidāya na virāgāya na nirodhāya na upasamāya na abhiññāya na sambodhāya na nibbānāya saṁvattati, yāvadeva ākiñcaññāyatanūpapattiyā’ti.
EN
Realizing that this teaching was inadequate, I left disappointed. I set out to discover what is skillful, seeking the supreme state of sublime peace. I approached Uddaka son of Rāma and said to him, ‘Reverend, I wish to lead the spiritual life in this teaching and training.’
Uddaka replied, ‘Stay, venerable. This teaching is such that a sensible person can soon realize their own denomination with their own insight and live having achieved it.’ I quickly memorized that teaching.
As far as lip-recital and verbal repetition went, I spoke the doctrine of knowledge, the elder doctrine. I claimed to know and see, and so did others. Then it occurred to me, ‘It is not solely by mere faith that Rāma declared: “I realize this teaching with my own insight, and live having achieved it.”
Surely he meditated knowing and seeing this teaching.’ So I approached Uddaka son of Rāma and said to him, ‘Reverend, to what extent did Rāma say he’d realized this teaching with his own insight?’ When I said this, Uddaka son of Rāma declared the dimension of neither perception nor non-perception.
Then it occurred to me, ‘It’s not just Rāma who had faith, energy, mindfulness,
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘na kho rāmasseva ahosi saddhā, mayhampatthi saddhā; na kho rāmasseva ahosi vīriyaṁ …pe… sati …
EN
immersion, and wisdom; I too have these things. Why don’t I make an effort to realize the same teaching that Rāma said he had realized with his own insight?’ I quickly realized that teaching with my own insight, and lived having achieved it.
So I approached Uddaka son of Rāma and said to him, ‘Reverend, had Rāma realized this teaching with his own insight up to this point, and declared having achieved it?’ ‘He had, reverend.’
‘I too have realized this teaching with my own insight up to this point, and live having achieved it.’ ‘We are fortunate, reverend, so very fortunate to see a venerable such as yourself as one of our spiritual companions! So the teaching that Rāma had realized with his own insight, and declared having achieved it, you’ve realized with your own insight, and dwell having achieved it.
The teaching that you’ve realized with your own insight, and dwell having achieved it, Rāma had realized with his own insight, and declared having achieved it. So the teaching that Rāma directly knew, you know, and the teaching you know, Rāma directly knew. Rāma was like you and you are like Rāma.
Come now, reverend! You should lead this community.’ And that is how my spiritual companion Uddaka son of Rāma placed me in the position of a tutor and honored me with high praise. Then it occurred to me, ‘This teaching doesn’t lead to disillusionment, dispassion, cessation, peace, insight, awakening, and extinguishment. It only leads as far as rebirth in the dimension of neither perception nor non-perception.’
PL
Ehi dāni, āvuso, tuvaṁ imaṁ gaṇaṁ pariharā’ti. Iti kho, bhāradvāja, udako rāmaputto sabrahmacārī me samāno ācariyaṭṭhāne maṁ ṭhapesi, uḷārāya ca maṁ pūjāya pūjesi. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘nāyaṁ dhammo nibbidāya na virāgāya na nirodhāya na upasamāya na abhiññāya na sambodhāya na nibbānāya saṁvattati, yāvadeva nevasaññānāsaññāyatanūpapattiyā’ti.
EN
Realizing that this teaching was inadequate, I left disappointed. I set out to discover what is skillful, seeking the supreme state of sublime peace. Traveling stage by stage in the Magadhan lands, I arrived at the town of Senā in Uruvelā. There I saw a delightful park, a lovely grove with a flowing river that was clean and charming, with smooth banks. And nearby was a village to resort to for alms.
Then it occurred to me, ‘This park is truly delightful, a lovely grove with a flowing river that’s clean and charming, with smooth banks. And nearby there’s a village to resort to for alms. This is good enough for striving for a gentleman wanting to strive.’ So I sat down right there, thinking:
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘ramaṇīyo vata bho bhūmibhāgo, pāsādiko ca vanasaṇḍo, nadī ca sandati setakā supatitthā ramaṇīyā, samantā ca gocaragāmo. Alaṁ vatidaṁ kulaputtassa padhānatthikassa padhānāyā’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, tattheva nisīdiṁ:
EN
‘This is good enough for striving.’ And then these three similes, which were neither supernaturally inspired, nor learned before in the past, occurred to me. Suppose there was a green, sappy log, and it was lying in water. Then a person comes along with a drill-stick, thinking
to light a fire and produce heat. What do you think, Bhāradvāja? By drilling the stick against that green, sappy log lying in water, could they light a fire and produce heat?” “No, worthy Gotama.
PL
‘aggiṁ abhinibbattessāmi, tejo pātukarissāmī’ti. Taṁ kiṁ maññasi, bhāradvāja, api nu so puriso amuṁ allaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ sasnehaṁ udake nikkhittaṁ uttarāraṇiṁ ādāya abhimanthento aggiṁ abhinibbatteyya, tejo pātukareyyā”ti? “No hidaṁ, bho gotama.
EN
Why is that? Because it’s a green, sappy log, and it’s lying in the water. That person will eventually get weary and frustrated.” “In the same way, there are ascetics and brahmins who don’t live withdrawn in body and mind from sensual pleasures. They haven’t internally given up or stilled desire, affection, infatuation, thirst, and passion for sensual pleasures. Regardless of whether or not they suffer painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion, they are incapable of knowledge and vision, of supreme awakening.
PL
Taṁ kissa hetu? Aduñhi, bho gotama, allaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ sasnehaṁ, tañca pana udake nikkhittaṁ; yāvadeva ca pana so puriso kilamathassa vighātassa bhāgī assā”ti. “Evameva kho, bhāradvāja, ye hi keci samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā kāyena ceva cittena ca kāmehi avūpakaṭṭhā viharanti, yo ca nesaṁ kāmesu kāmacchando kāmasneho kāmamucchā kāmapipāsā kāmapariḷāho so ca ajjhattaṁ na suppahīno hoti na suppaṭippassaddho, opakkamikā cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, abhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya. No cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti abhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya.
EN
This was the first example that occurred to me. Then a second example occurred to me. Suppose there was a green, sappy log, and it was lying on dry land far from the water. Then a person comes along with a drill-stick, thinking
to light a fire and produce heat. What do you think, Bhāradvāja? By drilling the stick against that green, sappy log on dry land far from water, could they light a fire and produce heat?” “No, worthy Gotama.
Why is that? Because it’s still a green, sappy log, despite the fact that it’s lying on dry land far from water. That person will eventually get weary and frustrated.” “In the same way, there are ascetics and brahmins who live withdrawn in body and mind from sensual pleasures. But they haven’t internally given up or stilled desire, affection, infatuation, thirst, and passion for sensual pleasures. Regardless of whether or not they suffer painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion, they are incapable of knowledge and vision, of supreme awakening.
PL
Taṁ kissa hetu? Aduñhi, bho gotama, allaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ sasnehaṁ, kiñcāpi ārakā udakā thale nikkhittaṁ; yāvadeva ca pana so puriso kilamathassa vighātassa bhāgī assā”ti. “Evameva kho, bhāradvāja, ye hi keci samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā kāyena ceva cittena ca kāmehi vūpakaṭṭhā viharanti, yo ca nesaṁ kāmesu kāmacchando kāmasneho kāmamucchā kāmapipāsā kāmapariḷāho so ca ajjhattaṁ na suppahīno hoti na suppaṭippassaddho, opakkamikā cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, abhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya. No cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, abhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya.
EN
This was the second example that occurred to me. Then a third example occurred to me. Suppose there was a dried up, withered log, and it was lying on dry land far from the water. Then a person comes along with a drill-stick, thinking
to light a fire and produce heat. What do you think, Bhāradvāja? By drilling the stick against that dried up, withered log on dry land far from water, could they light a fire and produce heat?” “Yes, worthy Gotama.
PL
‘aggiṁ abhinibbattessāmi, tejo pātukarissāmī’ti. Taṁ kiṁ maññasi, bhāradvāja, api nu so puriso amuṁ sukkhaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ koḷāpaṁ ārakā udakā thale nikkhittaṁ uttarāraṇiṁ ādāya abhimanthento aggiṁ abhinibbatteyya, tejo pātukareyyā”ti? “Evaṁ, bho gotama.
EN
Why is that? Because it’s a dried up, withered log, and it’s lying on dry land far from water.” “In the same way, there are ascetics and brahmins who live withdrawn in body and mind from sensual pleasures. And they have internally given up and stilled desire, affection, infatuation, thirst, and passion for sensual pleasures. Regardless of whether or not they suffer painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion, they are capable of knowledge and vision, of supreme awakening.
PL
Taṁ kissa hetu? Aduñhi, bho gotama, sukkhaṁ kaṭṭhaṁ koḷāpaṁ, tañca pana ārakā udakā thale nikkhittan”ti. “Evameva kho, bhāradvāja, ye hi keci samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā kāyena ceva cittena ca kāmehi vūpakaṭṭhā viharanti, yo ca nesaṁ kāmesu kāmacchando kāmasneho kāmamucchā kāmapipāsā kāmapariḷāho so ca ajjhattaṁ suppahīno hoti suppaṭippassaddho, opakkamikā cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, bhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya. No cepi te bhonto samaṇabrāhmaṇā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, bhabbāva te ñāṇāya dassanāya anuttarāya sambodhāya.
EN
This was the third example that occurred to me. These are the three similes, which were neither supernaturally inspired, nor learned before in the past, that occurred to me. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I, with teeth clenched and tongue pressed against the roof of my mouth, squeeze, squash, and scorch mind with mind?’
It was like when a strong man grabs a weaker man by the head or throat or shoulder and squeezes, squashes, and crushes them. In the same way, with teeth clenched and tongue pressed against the roof of my mouth, I squeezed, squashed, and crushed mind with mind until sweat ran from my armpits.
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I practice the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then winds came out my ears making a severe noise, like the puffing of a blacksmith’s bellows.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu kaṇṇasotehi vātānaṁ nikkhamantānaṁ adhimatto saddo hoti. Seyyathāpi nāma kammāragaggariyā dhamamānāya adhimatto saddo hoti; evameva kho me, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu kaṇṇasotehi vātānaṁ nikkhamantānaṁ adhimatto saddo hoti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then severe winds ground my head, like a strong man was drilling into my head with a sharp point.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā muddhani ūhananti. Seyyathāpi, bhāradvāja, balavā puriso, tiṇhena sikharena muddhani abhimattheyya; evameva kho me, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā muddhani ūhananti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then I got a severe headache, like a strong man was tightening a strong leather strap around my head.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā sīse sīsavedanā honti. Seyyathāpi, bhāradvāja, balavā puriso daḷhena varattakkhaṇḍena sīse sīsaveṭhaṁ dadeyya; evameva kho, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā sīse sīsavedanā honti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then severe winds carved up my belly, like a deft butcher or their apprentice was slicing my belly open with a sharp meat cleaver.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā kucchiṁ parikantanti. Seyyathāpi, bhāradvāja, dakkho goghātako vā goghātakantevāsī vā tiṇhena govikantanena kucchiṁ parikanteyya; evameva kho me, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā kucchiṁ parikantanti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears.
PL
Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, bhāradvāja, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā; sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho, teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ.
EN
But then there was a severe burning in my body, like two strong men grabbing a weaker man by the arms to burn and scorch him on a pit of glowing coals.
PL
Tassa mayhaṁ, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimatto kāyasmiṁ ḍāho hoti. Seyyathāpi, bhāradvāja, dve balavanto purisā dubbalataraṁ purisaṁ nānābāhāsu gahetvā aṅgārakāsuyā santāpeyyuṁ samparitāpeyyuṁ; evameva kho me, bhāradvāja, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimatto kāyasmiṁ ḍāho hoti.
EN
My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. Then some deities saw me and said, ‘The ascetic Gotama is dead.’ Others said,
‘He’s not dead, but he’s dying.’ Others said, ‘He’s not dead or dying. The ascetic Gotama is a perfected one, for that is how the perfected ones live.’
PL
‘na kālaṅkato samaṇo gotamo, api ca kālaṁ karotī’ti. Ekaccā devatā evamāhaṁsu: ‘na kālaṅkato samaṇo gotamo, nāpi kālaṁ karoti; arahaṁ samaṇo gotamo, vihāro tveva so arahato evarūpo hotī’ti.
EN
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I practice completely cutting off food?’ But deities came to me and said, ‘Good fellow, don’t practice totally cutting off food.
If you do, we’ll infuse heavenly nectar into your pores and you will live on that.’ Then it occurred to me, ‘If I claim to be completely fasting while these deities are infusing heavenly nectar in my pores, that would be a lie on my part.’
So I refused those deities, saying, ‘There’s no need.’ Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I just take a little bit of food each time, a handful of broth made from mung beans, horse gram, chickpeas, or green gram?’
Due to eating so little, my major and minor limbs became like the joints of an eighty-year-old or a dying man, my bottom became like a camel’s hoof, my vertebrae stuck out like beads on a string, and my ribs were as gaunt as the broken-down rafters on an old barn.
PL
Seyyathāpi nāma āsītikapabbāni vā kāḷapabbāni vā; evamevassu me aṅgapaccaṅgāni bhavanti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma oṭṭhapadaṁ; evamevassu me ānisadaṁ hoti tāyevappāhāratāya; seyyathāpi nāma vaṭṭanāvaḷī; evamevassu me piṭṭhikaṇṭako uṇṇatāvanato hoti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma jarasālāya gopānasiyo oluggaviluggā bhavanti; evamevassu me phāsuḷiyo oluggaviluggā bhavanti tāyevappāhāratāya.
EN
Due to eating so little, the gleam of my eyes sank deep in their sockets, like the gleam of water sunk deep down a well. Due to eating so little, my scalp shriveled and withered like a green bitter-gourd in the wind and sun.
Due to eating so little, the skin of my belly stuck to my backbone, so that when I tried to rub the skin of my belly I grabbed my backbone, and when I tried to rub my backbone I rubbed the skin of my belly. Due to eating so little, when I tried to urinate or defecate I fell face down right there.
Due to eating so little, when I tried to relieve my body by rubbing my limbs with my hands, the hair, rotted at its roots, fell out. Then some people saw me and said: ‘The ascetic Gotama is black.’ Some said: ‘He’s not black, he’s brown.’
Some said: ‘He’s neither black nor brown. The ascetic Gotama has dingy skin.’ That’s how far the pure, bright complexion of my skin had been ruined by taking so little food. Then it occurred to me, ‘Whatever ascetics and brahmins have experienced painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion—whether in the past, future, or present—this is as far as it goes, no-one has done more than this.
Could there be another path to awakening?’ Then it occurred to me, ‘I recall sitting in the cool shade of a black plum tree while my father the Sakyan was off working. Quite secluded from sensual pleasures, secluded from unskillful qualities, I entered and remained in the first absorption, which has the rapture and bliss born of seclusion, while placing the mind and keeping it connected. Could that be the path to awakening?’
Stemming from that memory came the understanding: ‘That is the path to awakening!’ Then it occurred to me, ‘Why am I afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities?’
Then it occurred to me, ‘I’m not afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities.’ Then it occurred to me, ‘I can’t achieve that pleasure with a body so severely emaciated. Why don’t I eat some solid food, some rice and porridge?’
So I ate some solid food. Now at that time the group of five mendicants were attending on me, thinking, ‘The ascetic Gotama will tell us of any truth that he realizes.’
But when I ate some solid food, they left disappointed in me, saying, ‘The ascetic Gotama has become indulgent; he has strayed from the struggle and returned to indulgence.’ After eating solid food and gathering my strength, quite secluded from sensual pleasures, secluded from unskillful qualities, I entered and remained in the first absorption …
As the placing of the mind and keeping it connected were stilled, I entered and remained in the second absorption … third absorption … fourth absorption. When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward recollection of past lives.
I recollected many past lives. That is: one, two, three, four, five, ten, twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, a hundred, a thousand, a hundred thousand rebirths; many eons of the world contracting, many eons of the world expanding, many eons of the world contracting and expanding. And so I recollected my many kinds of past lives, with features and details. This was the first knowledge, which I achieved in the first watch of the night. Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute.
When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward knowledge of the death and rebirth of sentient beings. With clairvoyance that is purified and superhuman, I saw sentient beings passing away and being reborn—inferior and superior, beautiful and ugly, in a good place or a bad place. I understood how sentient beings pass on according to their deeds.
This was the second knowledge, which I achieved in the middle watch of the night. Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute. When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward knowledge of the ending of defilements.
I truly understood: ‘This is suffering’ … ‘This is the origin of suffering’ … ‘This is the cessation of suffering’ … ‘This is the practice that leads to the cessation of suffering.’ I truly understood: ‘These are defilements’ … ‘This is the origin of defilements’ … ‘This is the cessation of defilements’ … ‘This is the practice that leads to the cessation of defilements.’
Knowing and seeing like this, my mind was freed from the defilements of sensuality, desire to be reborn, and ignorance. When it was freed, I knew it was freed. I understood: ‘Rebirth is ended; the spiritual journey has been completed; what had to be done has been done; there is nothing further for this place.’ This was the third knowledge, which I achieved in the last watch of the night.
Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute.” When he had spoken, Saṅgārava said to the Buddha, “The striving of the worthy Gotama was indeed assiduous and that of a true person, since he is a perfected one, a fully awakened Buddha.
But worthy Gotama, do gods survive?” “I’ve understood about gods in terms of causes.” “But worthy Gotama, when asked ‘Do gods survive?’ why did you say that you have understood about gods in terms of causes?
That being so, is it not hollow and false?” “When asked ‘Do gods survive’, whether you reply ‘Gods survive’ or ‘I’ve understood in terms of causes’ a sensible person would come to the categorical conclusion in this matter that gods survive.”
“But why didn’t you say that in the first place?” “It is agreed by the eminent in the world that gods survive.” When he had spoken, Saṅgārava said to the Buddha,
“Excellent, worthy Gotama! Excellent! As if he were righting the overturned, or revealing the hidden, or pointing out the path to the lost, or lighting a lamp in the dark so people with clear eyes can see what’s there, worthy Gotama has made the Teaching clear in many ways.
I go for refuge to the worthy Gotama, to the teaching, and to the mendicant Saṅgha. From this day forth, may the worthy Gotama remember me as a lay follower who has gone for refuge for life.”
Sutraya